once upon a time

...once a upon a time, there lived a Princess in a lovely castle that was set on a lovely green hill surrounded by lakes and forests and stuff...
the Princess was pretty and cheerful and could have as many ice-cream as she wanted but never grow fat... 
and she had kind and loving parents, who ruled their kingdom peacefully but rightfully, even without extra taxes, which was why they never really got rich, but then they just made it up for their daughter that money isn't what really makes you happy...
and she had a siamese kitten, who was her one true friend and, additionally (to keep the prestige of the royal family), a pet chinchilla with long ears, the really fashionable one...
she had a walk-in wardrobe full of mirrors, a whole huge room just for the shoes and a crew of make-up artists, stylists, hairdressers, personal trainers and catwalk professionals guarding her every step to ensure she always looks super-glammy-over-the-top-fabulously fashy and has shiny hair and a BMI under 21...


all in all, one can say - the Princess was a great catch for everyone, especially for knights on white horses cause the current color of her hair - diamond-chestnut with sunburn and brown-eggshell streaks - would have matched perfectly with the horse's shiny white and the knight's armor...


well, so here the Prince came.
he rescued our Princess from a dragon, whom she accidentally run into on her way back from a girlfriend's slumber party, found her missing shoe (that obviously still fitted), fought the kingdom's competitive army to cheer up the Princess' parents, found the missing treasure on the other side of the world, including a huge solitaire as a wedding gift, proved his true love for the Princess by first domesticating all the dragons in the neighborhood, then removing all the potential witches to far-far-away, then sustaining the flirting charms of other pretty looking princesses to-be, aka Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty etc etc, subsequently, he completed the check-in procedure for the upcoming princes, including some general tests on higher maths, theoretical nuclear physics and a waltz performance and then (totally exhausted!) calmly waited for the Princess to accept his marriage offer and finally have a nice long bubble bath...


well, what else could she do, right?!.. after all, the Prince was handsome, did sooo many nice and useful things for her (well, not especially for her, but... whatever...) and, let's face it - she was a Princess and the white-horsed knight was her fate anyway! 


and so she said 'yes', ordered a Parisian wedding gown and the entire Victoria's secret bridal lingerie collection, they had a huge wedding that costed the king and queen a fortune, went for Honeymoon on the beach, came back tanned, moved into a brand new castle with a roof-top terrace overlooking the kingdom and were very eager to start a life according to 'happily-ever-after'.
well, what else could they do, right?!


and then the fun started.


to be continued...

real reasons

when something happens to us, we generally notice the bad things more don't we?
outside my window the spring is happening, while I'll be staying home the second week around, sick. 
I missed the time when the flower buds are just coming out of the soft, fat earth. I missed the trees getting the green haze made of emerging leaves around the 
branches. I am missing them blooming and throwing the flower petals down the street, where they are carried away by the warm new wind.
am I sad?
I was angry, yes. especially when someone said to me 'well, everything happens for a reason - if you had to be sick so heavily, there was some reason in that, maybe your body was just asking for a rest'. 
I hate sentences like that. what sense could there be in being incapable of anything, while the time is hot in the lab, the experiments just going to boost? while everyone is reporting on BBQs, cycling, hiking, whatever...


and yet, looking at the picture that, after two years, I finally finished drawing in the time I was recovering, I am starting to think about the reasons.


why do bad things happen to us? I guess, this question is as old as the world, especially since mankind started to believe in a good god.
why do we fall for bad people?
what good or at least sensible can come out of being deceived by your best friend?
what sense does it make when your great love suddenly dies?
do you ever get these events in your life evened up with the good stuff?


I guess, I cannot answer that until I've lived until the end.
I just hope, that at least this is true: everything is a part of a grand plot. and our being is a part of it, as well. 
as the world is not happening around us, but inside of us.
and I hope to experience that sometime - like a drop of water, falling into the sea, realizes that it has always just been a part of it.